Is resilience learned or lived?
7 minute read
Jane Fardon, MD of FiveAndCo. gives her take on resilience and the advice she gives to leaders who want to strengthen their teams.
Much is written about resilience in the workplace and how to build it in your team, so I’m hesitant to add to the noise. However, it’s a topic that’s frequently raised by the senior leaders and executive teams we work with.
Most leaders want team members that can withstand change, ambiguity, and uncertainty - and who wouldn’t want that level of resilience? We all want to be surrounded by people who confidently weather these storms and are even able to carry others with them.
A lot of popular recommendations for developing resilience in the workplace focus on skills and behaviours such as mindfulness, mental agility, taking detachment breaks, etc (see the HBR article 5 ways to boost your resilience at work).
There is truth in that, but I think that this approach misses something important.
It is frequently said that in times of chaos, we do not rise to the occasion but fall to the level of our training, but I think there’s more to it than that, it’s also a way of thinking and being.
What if resilience is formed more through the way you live your life beyond work - cultivated through your lifestyle, rather than your workstyle?
A core foundation of resilience is having a strong sense of self; knowing who we are (warts and all) and having a sense of purpose in our lives (beyond the job we do). It’s about having our identity as much in ‘who we are’ as in ‘what we do’. When our identity is defined by what we do, our self-worth is increasingly defined by other people or circumstances outside our control.
When our wellbeing and self-confidence comes from our job alone, structural reorganisations or role changes can cause us to doubt ourselves and feel insecure. Professional insecurity tends to make us resistant to change, making us see ambiguity and uncertainty as a threat. The reality is that change, ambiguity and uncertainly will all impact ‘what you do’ – but they don’t affect ‘who you are’ or the value you bring.
So, what does it look like to live a life that enables us to withstand the change, ambiguity, and uncertainty that may dominate our work environment? How do we develop a sense of self and consequently, an unshakable resilience?
Our conversations with senior leaders suggest that, to a large extent, it’s about being selfless, connected and rooted, and experiencing joy. It is often expressed by getting alongside and serving others who need our help, through building the community and connections where we live (with our immediate family and beyond), and by experiencing the joy in the small details or vast gestures of nature.
What can we do as leaders to encourage this, when so much of it is about what’s beyond the 9-5? Here are some practical suggestions to start the conversation:
In your next 1:1s, show that you are interested in your team as people, beyond the role they're here to do.
Make time to be genuinely curious about their hobbies, interests, passions.
Use Town Halls or Team ‘all hands’ meetings to give a platform to team members who have experiences outside of work that connect them to their community and help them develop skills they need in their job.
When you recruit, look beyond their qualifications and experience to what motivates them when they are not at work.
The time you give to something demonstrates how much you value it. So, the time we give to these conversations, in 1:1’s and team meetings, will encourage our team to believe who they are outside of work is just as important as what they do at work.
Then when the external environment shifts beyond our control, your team will have a stronger inner resilience; they will be more secure in who they are, what they bring and their relationships with others, and much more able to navigate the journey without fear, panic, or self-doubt.
Resilience is the art of bouncing back, perhaps changed, but able to thrive despite major challenges or setbacks. There are skills you can learn, but to be truly resilient I invite leaders to take some simple steps to foster a positive sense of who they are, and where they fit in the world and to encourage this in those they lead.
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